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Archive for the ‘ Our Home ’ Category

Door 2 Door Booger…err…Alarm Salesman

A loud noise woke me up at 4am this morning in a total panic. In that moment of sheer confused fog, husband jumps up and mumbles something along the lines of “gotta check my computer”. Ya-that’s among the first things he thinks of in those ‘we’re about to die’ moments. I had a FLOOD of thoughts come in at an uncontrollable speed…. “oh my gosh, it’s the door 2 door alarm salesman…he wasn’t really selling alarms, he was scouting out houses to rob. Him and his partner were seeing which homes in the neighborhood are good targets. He was going to ROB US.”

My husband had returned to bed and about 4 seconds had gone by. Then there was a flash of lightening and a huge crash of thunder. Oh, right…thunder…that’s what the sound was that woke me up.

But still.

What if I’m right and this is some type of prophetic post. What if.

Here’s what happened, on Monday we were in our office working (we both telecommute for a company out of Salt Lake City) and hubs says “there is a dude coming to the door and I’m on a conference call”

I bounce down the stairs and go out on the porch before the guy can ring the doorbell and wake the guard dogs.

He “picked” (you’ll get that in a minute) our house to give us a free alarm system. All I had to do was fill out a little form. Now, before you go all judgy judge pants on me, I know. I’ve actually done this before, we have had horrible experience with those alarm systems/companies before – so why not try again! Plus, that was in Idaho and this is a new place, so was considering it. Mostly I had decided to have him come back and tell my hubs about the “smokin deal”. I fill out the little form and tell him tomorrow or the next day would be a good time to come back. *Sketchy part that didn’t cross my mind AT THE TIME* he said he just moved here and didn’t have a phone so he asked to use MY phone to call his “supervisor” and I said sure. But I did not let him inside. I went, got my phone and let him use it (another brilliant after thought…he now has my number programmed into whatever phone he dialed…).

He said he would call us on Tuesday to confirm the time he would be back with his supervisor.

He never called. I didn’t think about that until I was rudely awaken this morning by the loud noise (ok, the thunder).

Ugh.

He was scoping out our house. And let’s face it, neither hubs or myself are exactly built like Mr. T.

BUT, we don’t need an alarm because we have these GIANT terrifying dogs!!!

Oh wait, those were the wrong pics….how about this video.

Oops, wrong video…anyhow, they are vicious attack dogs. They just don’t always remember that.

BUT, THE ABSOLUTE WORST part about this entire ordeal…I wouldn’t be able to give the cops an accurate description if/WHEN this actually happens. This is just about how that conversation would go.. “he was tall, really tall. He had light brown hai….EEEW GIANT BOOGER. THERE WAS A BOOGER HANGING OUT OF HIS NOSE…I have NO idea what his face looked like. I COULDN’T look at his face. BOOOOGGGGEEEEERRRR”

WHAT IF that BOOGER was all part of his plan. To DISTRACT me from his facial features.

That’s it. We are putting up video cameras. I am suspicious.

UGH….and today is Wednesday.

Kitchen FAIL

We bought this older home, because it looks like a dollhouse from outside. (Well, that is why I wanted it, hubs didn’t want it at all)

Inside is a trainwreck. 

You don’t believe me, look here.

It has sooo much potential. And it has a pool. I like pools. Not to swim in, well sometimes, but mainly to lay out by. I feel silly laying out in a pool-less yard.

So, the kitchen is a giant nightmare. Ugly, but HUGE. So we are going to remodel it soon (likely in a year or two).  Because we are remodeling it and I have NO IDEA what I want…stove top, double oven, island, bar, stainless appliances, white appliances….etc…I haven’t put ANY work into the kitchen. Well, except that I removed the wallpaper, painted & put in a new floor, but that is a whole other story (literally).

So, the kitchen came with this gem:

Don’t be jealous. It’s ok, someday you too can have a sweet stove like this. Try thrift stores or craigslist, keywords ‘antique, vintage or old & moldy’.

But hey, it worked. So I couldn’t complain. Wasn’t about to go purchase a new stove when I didn’t know what I wanted when we remodel.

BUT! The other day my sister-in-law called me and said “Hey, a friend is selling an almost brand new gas stove for only $300″. I said “Done. I’ll take it!”

Then I asked hubs. Luckily he said yes!

So I got this:

Now, you can be jealous! It has 5 burners. It also has a level surface…all the grates meet together…so like I don’t have to balance burning hot casserole dishes between 2 burners while forgetting to actually put on a glove therefore each additional second that it takes me to balance the dish I am literally SEARING my fingers to the bones….not that I’ve actually EVER done that….

I was super excited about this stove. SUPER.

Hubs installed it within minutes of us getting it. It ROCKS!

I cooked anything I could RIGHT then. Like mini pizzas and a cake and stuff.

And then…..

I went to do the dishes.

RUT ROH!

 

That’s right. The friggin dishwasher (also from dinosaur ages) will. not. open.

I was super upset. Thought I was losing the new stove. But, hubs wiggled, pushed, wedged & fanagled the PERFECT solution.

STEP 1:

STEP 2:

Done deal.  NOW, you know a lot more about me.

I get to keep my stove, which makes me smile.

Who STOLE my lounge chair?

The sun has been out for a few days now. I decide its time to start cleaning up the back yard….aka entertainment zone. As I look around, the amount of work is overwhelming….mowing, fertilizing, tree trimming, weed pulling, repairs, de-greening the pool, setting up the pool chai…UMMMM….

SOMETHING IS WRONG….

1 CHAIR…..2 CHAIRS…..3 CHAIRS…..

WHERE IS MY 4TH CHAIR???

Me: “BRRYYYY, do you know where my 4th lounge chair is?”

Bry: “Uhhh, no!”

Me: “KIIIIDDDSSSSS, do YOU know where my 4th lounge chair is?”

Kids: “Uhhh…..what chair? why? whattya mean? huh?”

I check the back yard. I check the back-back yard. I check the front yard. I check the garage. The shed…..The living room……. Google Earth shows it was here last summer:

I’m baffled…..the kids think a chair has literally been stolen. But whhyyyy would someone just take ONE chair….nah….that can’t be it.

WAIT A MINUTE……

Do YOU THINK?????

OHHHHH

EEEEMMMMMMMMMM

GEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Betcha it’s at the bottom of the green pool!

AHHH HAAAA!!!

Well….that was exciting! Wonder what else we will find at the bottom of the pool. Good news is we decided it was time to clean the pool, so as I write this post, we are ALMOST able to see the 2nd step of the pool. So, by tomorrow, we JUST might be able to see the bottom.

*fingers crossed for no more treasures at the bottom*