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Archive for the ‘ Marriage ’ Category

Sure…I’ll Take Two!

Just over a year ago, I came home extremely P.O.’ed. That may be an understatement. I had been to about 7 different stores looking for any kind of stupid little pirate decor for Pirate Day at the school where I was required to build make a cake for the cake walk. (I was excited to make this cake prior to all this.)

I am not competitive or anything. I just like the stuff I make to be better than other peoples stuff uhh…store bought stuff….

So, after having ZERO luck at toy stores, dollar stores, cake shops, etc, I was stuck with the stupid cake topper set from the bakery at Walmart. It was lame.

This has little to do with my actual story, except to remind me of HOW MAD I WAS. And now behind. I only have so many hours in a day.

So, I get home, with the dumb little pirate ship garbage and prep the cake mix. As I am working in the kitchen, the door bell rings. That’s when the bouncy, happy go lucky husband comes BOUNDING down the stairs to answer the door WHILE INFORMING ME he actually INVITED the door-2-door vacuum salespeople to come in and demo their “goods”.

1. Of all the freaking days.


So, I tell them I am not in the mood, I have no time and don’t care to see their product all while never leaving the kitchen. The nice, extremely tall German lady proceeds with her demo, all while making SURE I could see her the whole time.

Steam was POURING out of every orifice I have. Seriously.

I see my husband smiling and getting all googly eyed at the ‘product’ in which he was originally told was an air filtration system…

The demo seemed to take 3 hours.

I stayed in the kitchen the ENTIRE time. Working on the stupid cake…which did turn out kinda cute in all my anger…

Meanwhile, of course he bought the super powered, spaceship looking, whole house air filtration master vacuum that can also double as a leaf blower, power washer & dog cleaner…

Scratch that. It’s just a vacuum.

But that’s totally ok, it was only like 5 grand. Ok, not really…but seemed like it at the time.

Reminds me of the time he bought the Water Softener. Or the time he bought the fancy cleaner that can’t be found in stores. Oh, and DO NOT TAKE HIM to a car dealership. He will offer to pay full price AND tip the salesman.

So, now when someone walks through the neighborhood with a clipboard or a folder or is wearing a backpack, we hide.

Last night was a reminder of this. He saw someone at the neighbors. He saw them sitting on stools on the persons front porch talking with them. He knew this could be bad. He grabbed a blanket and covered the only open window.

He made me write up a No Soliciting sign.

I think he knows his weakness. I will by all means help him conquer this weakness.

We will prevail. Even if we are held captive in the bedroom for an hour while we think they are out there.

Love you hunny! You’re just a super duper sometimes OVER-generous person!

*I feel it is UBER important to mention that since his vacuum purchase, he takes pride in vacuuming and rarely lets anyone else do it.

SCORE FOR ME!!! Big. Time.


Date Night for the WIN!

Menfolk: Take the ladies OUT. Date nights are a requirement.

I want to share a tradition we started years ago. We call it the Date Night Dash! No, this doesn’t mean ditching out on our bill at a nice restaurant….

This is one of the FUNNEST (I don’t care that funnest isn’t a real word) date nights EVER.

Step 1: Go to a fun, casual place for drinks and appetizers. Friday night we went out with our good (and gorgeous) friends Aaron and Nicolle. They were willing to participate in our little date night game.

Ok, back to the Date Night Dash instructions…

Step 2: Go to a different location for a light dinner. Don’t overeat, that will ruin the rest of the date!


Step 3: GO TO THE MALL (or some clothing store that is about to close for the night – not like one that is going out of business…) at approximately 8:40. Yes, 20 MINUTES before it CLOSES.

Separate and pick out a new outfit from head to toe WITHOUT trying anything on. Often you will even have time to spare…to take pictures of yourself with cardboard celebs…

This can even be done on a very small budget…places like Old Navy can be very affordable!

Step 4: Change your clothes IN YOUR CAR. (uhhhh….is this legal? If not, I totally didn’t mean that….change in a restroom or somewhere completely appropriate and LEGAL) But seriously, the car thing is not only HILARIOUS, it is rather SPICY as well… Girls, this is where you play along cuz the boys like it.

Step 5: Go to another destination like the movies, a place play pool or darts, go drive go-karts, go for a walk downtown, go sit and have coffee and dessert….anywhere, just GO somewhere else wearing your new stuff!

Our dates…or maybe the two of them were actually on the date together… But seriously…check out Bry’s HAWT new shirt!!!



We have our new stuff on….I didn’t think to have them take full body pics…

I had my leg kicked up…I wasn’t attacking Nicolle with a dart…she was my teammate. Better pic of the new outfit…CHECK OUT THE HAIR THING! Oh YA!

Then we went dancing.


Please go OUT and give this Date Night Dash a shot! It is a BLAST.

*Aaron, pictured WAY above, didn’t understand the rules. He bought a Barbara Streisand CD. He may never be allowed to participate in this date night ever again.

HUSBANDS: How to get bonus points: Get the childcare all arranged so she doesn’t have to!

Please PLEASE let me know if you go out on a Date Night Dash!

Song of Solomon 2:16
My lover is mine, and I am his.